Hijab Story | From owning 1 Jilbab to being the Queen of Jilbabs, Les Sultanas CEO’s Hijab Story
Why you should start with what you have.
In a weird way, I feel like I know all of you but you don’t really know me. As the Editor in Chief of Studio Sultanas, I get to read all of yours (even the ones that are not published yet), so it seems fair that you know mine.
As a born muslim, I grew up with the misconception that Hijab was optional (which it’s not), something for the sisters that were really “on their deen”. Later in my 20s, I found Islam again and that one month of Ramadan forever changed me. I recently quit my office job in Paris and got fired from the following one afterwards. It was actually the best thing that happened to me. I hated that place, even though I was there only 2 days. It was a sign for me to get that unemployment money and focus on my deen.
Ramadan came pretty quickly and it was the best month of my life. Everything felt different. I was with family, praying, reading the Quran, going to the mosque, taraweeh, late nights at my grandmas with everyone after the mosque. Such a blessed time. Back then, I was not a Hijabi yet and I didn’t know if I'd ever be. I wanted to, but didn’t feel ready or even worthy of it. I've learned really fast that it’s actually a trick from Shaytan. Don’t listen to him. So all I had in my wardrobe to pray at the mosque was a Jilbab that was 2 sizes too big that my big brother bought for my mum (but she didn’t like it) and ended up in my wardrobe.
I remember how amazing I felt being covered. It was amazing, peaceful, elegant, freeing. A roller coaster of emotions. I would be impatient to wear my Jilbab on Fridays for Jummu3a and afterwards, I would go grocery shopping or visit family in order to keep it on longer and longer. In between Fridays, I would come across sisters (Jilbesties ♥) and feel so envious of them. I remember thinking “look at them, they’re not scared. They do what Allah wants and here you are, not doing it”. My heart would break and I would make duas to be one of them someday. Thank God, I am today and pray to be everyday of my life, Ameen.
Ramadan came to an end. I remember needing to get out of the house after Eid and I just couldn’t. I just couldn’t pass the door without a Hijab on. I stopped, my hand at the handle thinking “I can’t”. I went back to my bedroom and grabbed my 2 sizes too big black Jilbab and put it on. My heart was racing, I was scared, excited but it felt amazing. I never stopped wearing it afterwards.
I had that one and only black Jilbab for months. Being unemployed, I expanded my wardrobe very slowly. Two to three months later I added 2 more Jilbabs. And then again months later. For years I have had about 5 jilbabs and that was it. No khimars (they were not a thing yet). A few fancy abayas that I’d never wear because the Jilbab was always my one true love. I started with what I had and Allah put so much baaraka into it.
So why did I feel like sharing my Hijab story now ? Because Ramadan is a powerful time of the year. And even as a Hijab brand CEO, I am here to tell you to start with what you have. Do not let consumerism (or Shaytan really) trick you into thinking that you have to redo your entire wardrobe right away. You have time for that, but each day you go outside without a Hijab on matters. Grab a Jilbab, run with it, don’t look back. You’ll have time to try and test looks and fabrics. See it as a new chapter of your life, don’t pressure yourself and try what I did. I cut myself off from trends and fashion for a while. I cut the noise and gave my heart time to truly fall in love with modesty.
So if you are considering wearing the Hijab this Ramadan, focus on what matters and remember that Allah is the most Generous. You can start with one 2 sizes too big black Jilbab and end up with your own brand and unlimited access to modest clothing.
You got this ♥x
